Caught in Tights

(Girls wiggle can top for reciting alphabet to find a boy friend. When it breaks on "K," they try to think up names)

Em
K that's for Kneau Reeves.
Stacey
Like, his names start with an N.
Em
A silent "K" like in "know," Like the silent "B" in dumb. (gestures to Stacey)
Stacey
Right like he's so hot he doesn't have to spell his name right.
Em
In that Bhudda movie he was so weird. All transcendental or something.
Stacey
Weird hair.
Em
In Speed he was cool. That girl he went for at the end is such a scag.
Stacey
I know, I wish I was stuck under a bus with him.
Em (guy walks by)
Bob, that's "B" no, not him.
Stacey (guy walks by)
Jim, he's hot maybe he has a silent "K" in his name.
Em (girl walks by)
Karen, uh I don't think so.
Stacey (another guy walks by)
Cary, yeah that's a K.
Em: Nope check his binder. He spells it with a "C."
(Boys enter DR and do the elaborate handshake)
Jason (fixes his hair)
So one time I put so much gel on my hair and then later I hit my head with my hand and it was hard as a rock.
Nick
Yeah, I hate it when that happens.
Stacey
Oh, they are so cool. First time I saw Jason I almost blew my top. The way he walks, the way he talks and the way he smiles just makes my heart pound harder and harder.
Em
Yeah, sure, you go for him then. There's no K in his name.
Stacey (crosses to boys)
Hi Jason.
Jason
Hi.
Stacey:
What are you doing?
Jason
Um, (sarcastic) Talking about our moms.
Stacey
That's sweet. Wasn't class so boring today?
Jason
I know she expects us to know all this nucleus stuff and I absolutely have no clue of what she is talking about.
Stacey
She just goes on and on and on and on til she starts to foam at the mouth or something. And little flecks of spit just fly out of her face. Like she's rabid or something. Eyeww and- and you just have to duck to not get any on you. She is just so gross.
Jason
Yeah, uh- right.
Stacey
It's like she doesn't even care about how she looks or anything. I would just die if I was that out of it. So maybe I'll see you at lunch or something, OK. (she walks off, and we all see that her is dress stuck in her panties. Boys laugh.)

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